Being diagnosed with MS reminds me of a moment in my life when I’d been tricked into going on a rollercoaster. My heart raced against my ribcage. I stared at the tree line—beautiful tall pines—for as long as I could until the force of the plunge snapped me into a cascade of flips and dips. And finally, a return back to the ground.
When I was diagnosed, it took me many days to process the doctor's words. While everyone around me was emotional, I was not. There was a part of me that didn't want to feel.
I didn't have the heart to tell my mother. It seems like a mother can cut through any façade. I told my cousins first, trying to downplay as much as possible. They were the ones that broke the news to my mother. If I could go back, I'd allow myself to feel. I think it would have helped the healing process.
My advice for someone being diagnosed is to take baby steps. Understand the basics of the disease. My diagnosis of relapsing MS felt like a wide umbrella covering my body and my mind. There are great resources out there but bombarding yourself in medical papers, YouTube, and other videos can be overwhelming. That’s true especially in the early stages, where a lot of what you’re doing is learning to accept.
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Stuifbergen A, Becker H, Phillips C, Horton S, Morrison J, Perez F. Experiences of African American Women with Multiple Sclerosis. Int J MS Care. 2021;23(2):59-65.
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Taylor J. Racism, Inequality, and Health Care for African Americans. The Century Foundation. December 19, 2019. Accessed April 16, 2023. https://tcf.org/content/report/racism-inequality-health-care-african-americans.
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